The Heart Of It

Here is the heart of it…

Last year I was waiting. The year started off with me being a substitute teacher while I was waiting to head off on my travels. I’ll admit it substitute teaching has never brought out the best in me. I don’t have the relationships with students that make me want to be a great teacher, and I happily leave at the end of the day to get home way earlier than if I had a contract. I remember telling someone that substitute teaching was the best for work/life balance but in my case that is really not true because there is very little on the work side of that scale. Enthusiasm went out the window after week one. I was waiting. Waiting for my travels. Waiting for a “better” job.

When I returned from my travels I headed straight back into the classroom, by straight back I mean that I returned on a Wednesday and started teaching full time on the Thursday. I neglected my work life balance here again but the scale had tipped the other way. My home life was suffering because I chose to dive into a classroom and everything that entails, right after I had been off traveling with friends for 5 weeks. It wasn’t fair to my (now) husband and it wasn’t fair to myself.

After the winter break I entered in to some of the toughest teaching times I’ve experienced. I talked about it a bit and I wrote about it but I wouldn’t say that I really ever dealt with it. During these times I was put in the place of defending what felt like every decision I made as a teacher. My confidence took a big blow but I never acknowledged that part of it. Instead I was back in the waiting game because I knew I had a way out into a different job. A new job meant a fresh start, or so I thought. But by ignoring the healing I needed to do I wasn’t setting myself up for success. Within the first few weeks I had that familiar drowning in work feeling – trying to deal with a new school, new grades, new students, and new colleagues. Again I switched into this “waiting mode” by deciding that I could make it to Spring Break and then start anew after.

Little did I know that after Spring Break I would break my arm, need surgery, and be out of the classroom for weeks. Again with the waiting. And then it was June and the craziness of end of year hit. This is probably the time I enjoyed most out of the school year, but I was still in that waiting stage. Waiting for summer. Waiting for my wedding. Waiting for a break.

No, it wasn’t all bad. I really loved both my classes and made strong connections with lots of students and families. I enjoyed experimenting with the new curriculum. I got to travel and see more of the world, and experience that change in mindset that comes with it. I planned my wedding that was a perfect love filled and fun day.

Well since you asked I’ll throw in a photo…                 Oh you didn’t ask?

So what didn’t work? What did all that waiting mean? It meant that I was not being mindful. I was not living in the moment. I was not fully present for all those moments in my life.

With this in mind, and the fact that I am heading into a busy year with my Masters starting this weekend. By making some important commitments to myself I feel ready for the year and I’m so excited for all the learning and growth that lies ahead. This year I am making a commitment to wait less, process more, and be more mindful:

First, I will listen to constructive criticism from the people I respect, and ignore criticism that is meant to harm.

Second, I will find ways to be happy in the job that I am in. Through good and bad times there are always ways to be happy – a connection with a colleague or a student, a creative teaching idea, an extracurricular, etc. (And no, I don’t have a job yet but I will! Positive thinking, positive thinking!)

Finally, I will practice yoga and/or meditation regularly. Focusing my mind always helps me to live in the moment and be present for the people that matter most.

Here’s to a year filled with mindfulness, love, and lots of laughter – We can do this together, teachers!

 

And This Is Why I Teach… (Plus Teach it Tuesday)

Well it was Canadian Thanksgiving on the weekend which means my brain hit holiday mode and I totally forgot to get my post up. So I’ve combined the Teach it Tuesday post this week with my regular post. If you enjoyed our Olympics unit for French last year than you are in luck! We just finished a new unit to start off French this year – L’École. With lots of games and activities along with French vocabulary practice, we would love your feedback on this product if you end up using it in your classroom. Grab a copy of our unit here on our Teachers Pay Teachers site.

This year I am teaching math, language arts, social studies, French, and PE. I absolutely love this teaching schedule and the balance it provides. I have taught language arts and French a lot so I find that I have lots of creative ideas and planning is very straightforward. Math is my focus this year so I have been putting a lot of energy into planning my lessons and assessing the students. PE is a subject that I am very comfortable with, especially after coaching multi-sport kids programs for four years during university and lots of summer camp work too. So then comes social studies… I absolutely LOVE social studies! I love travel and history and politics and social change! But I have never taught social studies and despite the help I’ve been given by friends and colleagues I was feeling uninspired (my best guess is that I was feeling uninspired because deep down I was feeling insecure about how to best teach Socials).

So on Friday I planned an “easy prep” lesson to get going with our short unit on Mesopotamia: a video from Discovery Education and an activity looking at the roles and jobs of citizens in ancient Sumer. It was not well planned or inspired. I wasn’t dreading it but I definitely wasn’t excited for it…

But then it happened. The simple discussion became something so much more. There was thoughtful responses, deep questions, and full class participation. I reminded myself not to lecture but to question students to draw out responses from students thoughts and knowledge. And they had so much to offer! Pure inspiration right from the source…

And this is why I teach.

As much as I often love to lose myself in the planning and prep work, that is not what it’s about.

As much as I want to challenge myself to become a master of the curriculum and different ways to teach it, that is not what it’s about.

As much as I love creative, inspired, well planned projects, that is not what it’s about.

It’s the moments of connection, learning, and growth. It’s the moments I can’t plan. The ones I can’t force. It’s the ones that catch me off guard when I’m feeling uninspired. Those are the moments when I come alive in this teaching job.

And this is why I teach.